Losing a spouse or partner changes everything. There are so many things you’re not prepared for:
- making decisions on your own,
- navigating holidays and milestones,
- parenting through grief,
- finding your new identity,
- answering difficult questions,
- and figuring out how to build a life that looks different from the one you imagined.
I’ve been there.
In 2016, I lost my husband, Mike, unexpectedly in a car accident. Our children were just nine and six. In the years since, I’ve learned that moving forward doesn’t mean moving on; it means learning how to live again alongside your grief. And, eventually, discovering that life can hold happiness, purpose, connection, and even joy again.
That’s why I’m offering Moving Forward, a one-on-one peer mentoring program through The MRP Project for men and women who have lost a spouse or partner.
While I’m not a therapist, I am certified in grief coaching. But more importantly, I have something different: lived experience. I’m here as someone who has walked this road.
I’ll share my experiences—the good, the bad, the incredibly difficult, and the unexpectedly wonderful. I’ll tell you what I wish someone had told me during those early years. I’ll share what helped me, what didn’t, the mistakes I made, and the things I eventually learned along the way.
Most importantly, I’ll share something I didn’t believe was possible in the beginning:
There can be a good life after loss.
Not the same life.
Not the life you planned.
But a good life.
My Experience with Post-traumatic Growth
For a long time, I thought the goal was to survive. But over time, I began to recognize something else happening. Along with the pain and loss, I was developing new strengths, interests, and hobbies, and discovering a deeper sense of purpose.
I experienced what is often described as post-traumatic growth, positive personal changes that can emerge after experiencing a profoundly difficult event. It doesn’t mean I’m grateful for what I’ve lived through. It means I’ve learned that something good can grow alongside something terrible.
Creating The MRP Project is one example. What began with my own experience of loss ultimately became a nonprofit dedicated to providing hope through social support.
What Mentoring Might Look Like
Everyone’s experience with loss is different. So, our conversations will be shaped around you.
We might talk about:
- What the first year is really like
- The things people don’t tell you about grief
- Parenting after the loss of a spouse
- Making decisions on your own
- Navigating holidays, birthdays, and milestones
- Friendships and relationships after loss
- Finding your identity again
- Returning to work or finding a new purpose
- Handling the inevitable good days and the really bad ones
- Allowing yourself to experience happiness without guilt
- Finding meaning after loss
- Building a new life while still honoring the person you lost
- Recognizing your own strength
- And, ultimately, discovering what moving forward can look like for you
Sometimes you may want to talk. Sometimes you may need someone to listen. Sometimes you may want validation and to hear, “Yes. I went through that, too.” And sometimes you may need someone a few steps ahead of you to say: “I know this feels impossible right now. But I promise, it won’t always feel this way.”
Meet However You’re Most Comfortable
Mentoring sessions can take place:
- In person. For those who prefer a face-to-face conversation.
- By phone. Sometimes talking from the comfort of your own home is easier.
- By Zoom. A convenient option no matter where you live.
The format is flexible. The goal is to create a safe, comfortable space for honest conversation.
If you’d like to learn more about Moving Forward or talk with me about whether mentoring might be right for you, I’d love to hear from you.
Let’s Talk. Please schedule an appointment here. Or email me at mrp8project@gmail.com
Moving Forward is a peer mentoring program and is not a substitute for professional mental health counseling, therapy, or other clinical services. If you are experiencing significant emotional distress or need professional support, I encourage you to seek help from a qualified mental health professional.